CONTEST – First Date Tips and Horror Stories
After being roundly criticized by readers for suggesting a first date hike, I thought I’d solicit advice for First Date Tips so I get it right the next time. I figure while we’re at it, why not make it a contest with fabulous prizes, in the tradition of Honey and Lance’s First Kickass Contest. (btw – When a divorced single dad can win a relationship contest, the world is a very cool place, indeed.)
Announcing:
I Rocked the House! – Dad’s House First-Date Contest
Tell us your best First Date Ideas, First Date Things to Avoid, Memories of a Great First Date, or First Date Horror Stories. Whatever you want – just stick to the theme of first dates.
• First Prize gets an Amazon.com eGift card worth $25.
• Second Prize gets an Amazon.com eGift card worth $20.
Both winners will get a cool badge to stick on their blog (similar to the Honey and Lance one in my blog’s sidebar.)
Contest starts immediately, and you have a week to get it done. All entries should be submitted by midnight PST on Sunday June 8, 2008. You can post on your own blog and comment here with a link back to your entry. (You can also put your two cents in here without a blog post, but prizes will be awarded for blog posts since it’s easier to point at them.)
You don’t have to be a regular Dad’s House reader to enter. But Dad’s House readers already know that candor and humor count equally, and nothing’s taboo. (Please try to keep things PG-13.) If you feel compelled to write about coffee dates, which I hate, just make sure your entry kicks ass and you’ll still have a shot to win.
On Monday June 9, I’ll link back to all the entries, take some time to read them and pick winners. (Campaigning for posts, whether for your own or a favorite, is totally fine. Just send me an email or comment here. Bribes take you to the front of the queue.)
If all goes well, I’ll announce the winners on Tuesday June 10.
Let the first date madness begin!
[Ed. Note: here are the contest winners.]
- Relationship Compatibility
- Is Dating Easier for Single Dads than Single Moms?
- Dating Tips for 40-Something Men
- Sexy Flirty Dirty Text Messages
- Relationship Dating 101: First Meeting
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Comment by mssinglemama
| June 1st, 2008
Love it! I’m so in….
If I win, I’ll save my Amazon card so I can buy your book when a brilliant publisher discovers it. And, I really, really want your badge, but only if there’s a red hat on it somewhere.
Comment by Kat Wilder
| June 1st, 2008
My best first date story is decidedly not PG-13, so let’s just skip that. Good story, nonetheless …
Honestly, what’s a date nowadays anyway? Meeting at Starbucks? Uh, don’t think so. But if you want to see if there’s a “there” there, short and sweet works, and it could spill over into more if you two connect (and that includes a short hike in a very public place; I’m on your side!)
I, of course, learned that the hard way, in my very naive dating beginnings post-divorce.
But I digress. So, scrolling through Craigslist’s “Men Seeking Women,” I read an enticing post. Now, I’m pretty leery of Craigslist for anything other than selling my son’s Lego collection or looking for a job, but I know a few wonderful people who have used it for dating, successfully, and so I gave it a shot.
I e-mailed him back with an equally clever reply (well, by my standards, anyway).
He responded and then we e-mailed pics. His was fuzzy but he looked normal enough, and so we agreed to a meet at a nearby bakery-cum-coffeehouse.
As soon as he showed up, I realized why the picture was fuzzy. He had on a bad toupee (or was he having a really bad hair day?), and horrifically crooked teeth. But, hey, we agreed to meet, and I figured I’d at least try to get to know him before I let my “blink” moment take over. He seemed nice enough — I guess his only major “fault” was that he was a big golfer; I am not, although I tried it once. But there just wasn’t a good chemistry thing and as we sat there, I realized I wasn’t fully over my last relationship, either. In fact, I was still really conflicted over it.
So, as we parted, I was honest with him, sorta. I didn’t dwell on the chemistry thing or even the golf — it was the guy’s passion! — so I told him that I wasn’t fully over my last relationship, which was the truth, and I wished him the best.
When I got home, there was an e-mail from him (he lived in the town of the bakery-cum-coffeehouse; I was one town over).
He nailed into me about how I was cruel and dishonest, and how I led him on, and so on and so on. I was blown away; we agreed to a coffee (OK, I had tea!) to see if we connected and we didn’t … or maybe I didn’t). There were no promises of anything else — how could there be? — and there shouldn’t have been any expectations of anything else, either.
So, I guess my first date advice is this — go with an open mind, be honest and know where your own mind is at. If you have expectations, or bad mojo from the past (and I’d say he and I both did, in our own ways), lose it before you meet because you won’t be fully in the moment.
And maybe don’t send fuzzy pics.
And realize that sometimes, it’s not you; it’s him!
Comment by Kat Wilder
| June 1st, 2008
Oh good lord — I need better reading glasses! I meant “My best first date story …”
and, what is that extra word doing in, “But if you want to get see if there’s a “there” there …”?
Maybe some guy will enter this contest writing about how he went on a first date with a nice Marin divorced mom who couldn’t spell for crap!
[Ed. Note: I went into Kat's previous comment and fixed the typos she refers to here. But I'm leaving this comment because the crack about the Marin divorced mom is just too dang funny! - David]
Comment by Backpacking Dad
| June 1st, 2008
An afternoon date:
Pack a picnic lunch. Invite her to meet you at SFO in the arrivals area, and then take a town car from the airport to Golden Gate Park to walk the De Young. After the museum set up your picnic on one of the many grassy areas in the park. After lunch walk the Japanese gardens, and then take a town car back to the airport.
What’s good about this date is that it is memorable; the spending you do will be inconspicuous, even though significant; the beginning and end permit undistracted conversation, while the middle portions involve conversation pieces; and it is almost all actually public, though most of it will feel intimate.
What’s bad about this date is that the ride from the airport and back will cost you; getting both of you to the airport in the first place may involve either public transit or parking structures.
Comment by lisaq
| June 2nd, 2008
Oh I am so in! Posted this one a few months ago, but it was hand’s down one for the first date horror stories books!
Here’s the link! Enjoy!
http://40ssingleness.blogspot.com/2008/03/lisaqs-most-bizarre-date-yet.html
Comment by dadshouse
| June 2nd, 2008
Ms Single Mama – you’re funny. Thanks for the props. I thought you and everyone else hated my red hat!
Kat – great story. Isn’t it amazing how some people (a lot of people? Most people?) misrepresent themselves during online dating? The blurry photo’s have got to go. I met a woman once who looked similar to her photo, but different enough that I just didn’t think it was her. (She was 30 pounds heavier in person). When I asked, she admitted the photo she sent was of her sister, and was that a problem? Um… yes.
Backpacking Dad – wow, what a date! The whisking away from the airport in a towncar is pretty great. And I love the Japanese gardens in GG Park. (My son loves the arched bridges).
Comment by mapiprincesa
| June 2nd, 2008
Okay…I’m in Quito, Ecuador. Two Ecuadorian ‘friends’ set me up with a guy–no, excuse me, a psycho–and then told me they were heading out to a house party. Fun! “As long,” I said, “as I can return to Papillon afterwards, as my (gringo) friends are all going to meet up there again tonight.”
(side note: the night before we had sought out the Bar Papillon, ended up on top of the bar dancing and drinking and having a great time, and 20 guys followed us out. Ah, those were the days…)
They agreed to my terms and we left for the party. Of course I was the only gringa in attendance but that didn’t bother me as I could dance and speak the lingo; that’s all that counts sometimes. So a couple drinks into the night my ‘friends’ announce to me that they are heading off to a more “private” home and asked if we wished to accompany them or stay at the party. Quickly my mind raced through the mathematics of the equation: a six-some with a guy who was giving me the heebie-jeebies or stay at a party where, at the very least, I was around others even if there was nobody else I knew there.
I opted for staying at the party.
I think my date was so upset at the blatant denial that he started tossing back drinks–and it was at that point that I stopped drinking for the night as I realized this could get ugly and I had better remain sober. I kept pressuring him to get me to Papillon, as I knew my friends were waiting for me there. He kept saying ‘yeah, yeah, in a while.’ Finally he was drunk enough that I persuaded him to just take me back to the hotel where we were staying (I lived in Guayaquil and was just visiting Quito).
We squealed through the deserted streets of Quito (on what had not exactly been my first drunken ride through Ecuadorian roads) at 2:30 in the morning. I had no bearings about me as I didn’t live there; I had no idea where I was and, as in many Ecuadorian cities at that time, a great deal of electricity was cut, including street lights, at midnight to save on energy. So it was dark, unrecognizable, deserted…and then we hit a red light.
He actually stopped for the red light (that can be newsworthy anywhere in South America).
He leaned over me and grunted into my face in Spanish, “You’re lucky I’m not Jack the Ripper or something, and would open this glove compartment here right now, whip out a knife and slit your throat.”
I was so terrified, my hand was on the door handle but I could not open the door as my logic told me that I could not get back to where I belonged as I had no idea where I was. I was lost in a strange city with Mr. Drunk Psycho Dude threatening me in his front seat.
The light turned green and he stepped on the accelerator (another newsworthy event…that he actually waiting for a green light) and I can’t tell you how much time passed (I was so busy working through an escape plan…anything…) until we pulled up to a very familiar gated entrance–it was my hotel!
Mr. Drunk Psycho Dude then had the gall to lean over me and try to kiss me as I fumbled with the door opener. I slapped his face and jumped out of the car. I rang the bell of the hotel and the guard took his sweet time coming to the gate. In the meantime, Mr. Drunk Psycho Dude had recovered from the slap in the face, jumped out of his car and was coming for me. So, sick and tired by then of waiting around for “Latin Time” of “I’ll get there when I get there” because I felt endangered, I climbed the gate, unlatched the lock, and slammed the gate shut in Mr. Drunk Psycho Dude’s face just in time, then ran past an equally stunned hotel guard up to my room.
*—-*
In the meantime there was a citywide search going on for me. The girls who had separated from me had returned and our “chaperone” on the trip (I was on uni exchange at this time) had asked where the hell I was. As the Precious Gringa had not returned with the rest of her party, the girls were in Big Sh*t and the rest of the group was out walking the streets of different districts of Quito calling my name.
It was a couple of hours later that I learned of this, when I heard my name being called from down the corridor of the hotel. I was then told the entire story…and could tell mine.
I’ve yet to return to Quito.
—Okay, how is that for my horror story entry? Wish I could say any part of it was made up.
Comment by mapiprincesa
| June 2nd, 2008
oh, and by the way, there was NEVER a second-date. Do one-date wonders count?
Comment by dadshouse
| June 2nd, 2008
MapiPrincesa – Oh my God, that’s scary. Of course there was no second date! But I’m glad you added that comment, because after reading your story I was mortified, and when I read that 2nd date comment it made me laugh. Nice entry! Let’s see who can top that…
Comment by DC Nicole
| June 2nd, 2008
First Date: take her out to dinner and drinks = Done!
No hiking!!!!!!!!!!!
Just DO NOT do what I did one time and agree to go out with someone that I met AT THE END of a pub crawl/day of drinking… I thought he was so cute…
He came and picked me up for our first date and my thought was,
“OMG, I can’t believe I was beer goggling that badly, this guy is NOT cute and now I have to go on a date with him”
Thankfully, we went to a cinema and draft house so we didn’t have to talk much- I just watched the movie… and drank some more.
Welcome to SVMoms !
Pingback by i’m pretty sure « UNCABLED HEART | June 2nd, 2008
[...] 3, 2008 at 2:57 am · Filed under dating, men, relationships, single that i’ve got this one all wrapped up. how about i link to my old datingonlinelosers blog and call it a day? ah. too bad I’ve [...]
Comment by lisaq
| June 2nd, 2008
Oh I’ve so got this one…posted the story awhile back. Definitely my most bizarre first date horror story!
Here’s the link. Enjoy!
http://40ssingleness.blogspot.com/2008/03/lisaqs-most-bizarre-date-yet.html
Comment by lisaq
| June 2nd, 2008
ugh…i’ve tried 3 times to leave my entry! :( Okay, 3rd times the charm right?
lisaq’s most bizarre date yet
Pingback by Dad’s House First-Date Contest « Qtmama’s Weblog | June 3rd, 2008
[...] having a First-Date contest. See the full details here. To sum it up, “Tell us your best First Date Ideas, First Date Things to Avoid, Memories [...]
Comment by One Date Wonder
| June 3rd, 2008
It’s one thing to split the check (although I don’t necessarily care for it.) It’s another all together to tally out expenses down to the last quarter.
http://onedatewonder.wordpress.com/2008/03/01/paying-for-it/
And, for the record? I was going to go out with him again until that happened.
(My more fantastically funny stories are usually guys I manage to weed out before a date can take place. Let me know if you’re ever trolling for those! ;) )
Comment by whatmenthink
| June 3rd, 2008
First Date Horror Story
by WMT
It was October in 2004 and the warm winds of Southern California were devoid of moisture. I was an innocent undergrad with a bad case of all-year-round-Spring-Fever and she was a doe-eyed girl wearing white pants and a black thong. I know! Perfect love story, right? It all started in my Marketing Strategies class. She had missed the first day of lecture and I graciously offered to make her a copy of the syllabus. We chatted as the copier blinked back and forth. I smiled. And, she smiled. I suggested that we meet up for a drink later that week. It was “On” like “Donkey Kong”!
She had to attend a friends Halloween party, but promised to meet me afterwards. No problem! I would get liquored up with my friends, while she got liquored up with hers. Fantastic. First date booty call?
We met up around midnight at a local bar. Her big brown eyes and black hair sparkled in the neon ambient lighting… She was in a sailor costume! Actually, it might have been a school girl costume!? Does it really matter at this point? I was like a bronco ready to exit the bucking chute! This was a college boy’s wet dream! She had a few more drinks, before she suggested taking off. I wanted to be on my “A” game so I laid of the booze. She said she felt a bit tipsy and asked if I could drive her home and bring her back to pick up her car the next day. SCORE! I had closed the deal. This was possibly the best first date ever!
It was a 20 or 30 minute drive to her place (Southern California is a nightmare when it comes to driving distances!). I left the music off and we chatted for a few minutes before I realized that she was getting very intoxicated. I guess the last few drinks had put her over the top? She stopped talking and dozed off for a second. Crap!!! I started evaluating the situation. I’m not a rapist or a roofie dropper! There was no way I was going to hook-up with a girl who had passed out. But the costume was looking great… She had invited me over before passing out… NO! I wouldn’t do it. Wait… what’s that smell??? Thats when I realized just how intoxicated she was! She had urinated all over herself in my car! Holy S#!T!!! Not cool…
We got to her house and I pulled her out of the car. “Why am I all wet?” She asked. Think quickly!!! The sprinkers were on so I told her that they had sprayed her. I didn’t want to embarass her further, right? I carried her upstairs. By this time I was a bit tired and needed to urinate myself. IRONY! So, I ducked into her restroom to take care of business. After I had finished and washed my hand (Always wash your hands!), I was about to leave when I heard her calling me. I opened the door to find her stark naked and groggy eyed on the bed in her best effort to seduce me.
Sorry, wet pants! NO THANKS!
I left.
Comment by dadshouse
| June 3rd, 2008
For a peek into your contest judge’s mind, let me say that this line from WMT’s story is LMAO funny: she was a doe-eyed girl wearing white pants and a black thong. I know! Perfect love story, right?
Love all the entries coming in!
Pingback by first date, revisited « UNCABLED HEART | June 4th, 2008
[...] (i’m telling this story as per this post here) [...]
Comment by B
| June 4th, 2008
Okay. I posted one :) I think it will track back to your comments here. Peace :)
Comment by The Exception
| June 5th, 2008
I didn’t write a story but tried to write something that would provide fun ideas. Of course, everything is very subjective, but it is possible to have a fun first date without compromising safety.
I hope the link works
http://miamilf.blogspot.com/2008/06/fun-contest.html
Comment by The Exception
| June 5th, 2008
I didn’t write a funny first date story or a horror experience but more some ideas that illustrate how a first date can be fun while still allowing a woman to feel safe.
http://miamilf.blogspot.com/2008/06/fun-contest.html
Comment by Single_M0M
| June 5th, 2008
Sadly, I have not been on a first date in YEARS. The men I have met since my divorce have been friends of friends and we managed to get together in large social situations to avoid the first date awkwardness.
Even more sad is the fact that I stayed with my husband (boyfriend at the time) after he called me by my best friend’s name while we were in bed together for the first time…
Nevertheless, I can still find the humor in dating and being back in the single’s scene:
First Date: How to Avoid Having it Be Your Last
Comment by Diane K. Danielson
| June 5th, 2008
How does a non-daredevil date in a world where first dates could qualify for episodes of Survivorman? Here’s a link to a recent column about how for some of us: Fear does not Equal Fun: http://womensdish.typepad.com/the_womens_dish/2008/03/the-far-side-of.html#more
Comment by The Exception
| June 6th, 2008
I didn’t write a comedy of a first date or a hair raising tale of a meetig, but I did draft a few fun ideas that illustrate how a first date could be fun and still appeal to a woman’s desire to feel safe.
Comment by The Exception
| June 6th, 2008
Having link/comment issues. Entry is “A Fun Contest” from 4 June at my site!
[Ed. Note: here's the link A Fun Contest]
Pingback by My Perfect First Date | Honey and Lance | June 6th, 2008
[...] Here’s my idea of a perfect first date. It’s not really a date at all, but more like a combination pickup and instant date. This post doubles as my entry in the dadshouseblog contest. [...]
Comment by Lance
| June 6th, 2008
My ideal first date:
http://honeyandlance.com/my-perfect-first-date
Basically a fantasy, but a man can dream. Ladies, there’s a steamy sex scene in there. Fair warning.
L
Comment by Cathouse Teri
| June 6th, 2008
I do have a male friend who says, “Hell, the first date is easy to get. It’s the second date that’s a tough one!”
I guess that is why the pointers about the first date might help.
Do you mean a first date with someone you met online and are meeting for the first time face to face? Or just a first date in general?
Comment by dadshouse
| June 6th, 2008
Teri – any first date, doesn’t have to be online. In fact, maybe your advice is to not use online dating!
Lance – do we need protection for your steamy sex scene? Or I suppose, after my condom post, protection is a choice each reader can make for themselves.
Comment by Cathouse Teri
| June 6th, 2008
I went and read Lance’s story. I was thinking the same thing! Where was the stop-the-steamy-sex-scene(twice) to get the condom and put it on.
Now, I know of some creative ways to make that whole uncomfortable interruption stay fun. So I know it’s possible.
Pingback by Honey’s Perfect First Date | Honey and Lance | June 6th, 2008
[...] As Lance says here, the perfect date is indeed a blog-worthy subject. I’ve been on many first dates myself (in fact, that was practically all I used to go on) and while I have to agree with Dadshouse that most online daters aren’t terribly original when it comes to first dates, I thought I’d put in my two cents as part of my entry for his First-Date Contest. [...]
Comment by whatmenthink
| June 7th, 2008
Competitions is reading pretty steep!!! uh oh!
Comment by Cathouse Teri
| June 7th, 2008
Okay, Dad. My contest entry is posted. That was what I was supposed to do, right? Post it at my place and link to here?
[Ed. Note: here's the link to her entry]
Comment by evilwoobie
| June 7th, 2008
Hi, dad. Here’s my entry. http://evilwoobie.com/2008/06/08/my-almost-perfect-first-date/
Thanks to Honey and Lance for posting about it. :D
Comment by Cathouse Teri
| June 8th, 2008
Hee hee. I was confused about having to link it. Since my name links it. And it’s the first post. But you meant, LINK the specific post. Gotcha. (I think.)
Thanks for the add, Ed. :)
Comment by mssinglemama
| June 8th, 2008
Here’s my entry:
http://mssinglemama.wordpress.com/2008/06/08/the-biker/
Mine is a memory of a my first post-divorce date and boyfriend. Enjoy!
Comment by Single Mom Seeking
| June 9th, 2008
Here’s my entry… I just ran into this guy again, seven years later, during my last trip to NYC. He’s married now, with two kids. Whoa.
http://www.glamour.com/lifestyle/blogs/pregnant/2008/05/thurs.html
Comment by Jaclyn
| June 9th, 2008
Wow, these were all really good and enjoyable to read. I don’t have a story of my own (none good or bad enough to compete) but this has been a really great post and I’d love to hear more stories.
Pingback by Congratulations to Me! | Honey and Lance | June 10th, 2008
[...] you didn’t know, I won the First Date contest over on Dad’s House! Check out DM’s original post with the contest parameters (plus all the awesome comments left by his readers) as well as his [...]
Comment by Spencer @ Horror Costumes
| August 19th, 2009
What a great site, I never knew anything like this existed, keep up the good work, I will Be pointing a couple of my friends this way.
Spencer @ Horror Costumes´s last blog ..Horror Make Up