Comments on: Is Dating Easier for Single Dads than Single Moms?

By: dontask

dontask — Mon, 07 Sep 2009 05:05:09 +0000

Why would I date a single dad?? They have too much baggage,still hung up on the ex,etc.The only time I deal with secondhand goods is when I am shopping at the local thrift store.

Besides,I deserve better than sloppy seconds.Perhaps if I weigh 180 pounds,shopped at Lane Bryant, and been divorced 3 times then I would have to lower my standards.

I just allow single dads to think I’m interested in them, but that’s until I meet somebody better

By: hmm yeah

hmm yeah — Tue, 16 Sep 2008 13:12:05 +0000

Well i was in the same situation. i dated a single dad of a 6yr old girl. There really was no custody arrangement. The mother got the girl about 1x a month. i lived with him so i became the mom. Mind you i am 24 and he is 27. The ex destroyed him financially so when i came into his life, i was seen as a rescuer to rebuild his life. I was glad that the little girl filled an emotional and nurturing need in my life but just having her and the mess her mother caused them both sent me packing. i did all the mothering: driving her to school, bathing her, doing laundry and everything else while mom who is the same age does nothing just because she does not get child support. well i basically got tired and figured you don’t want any kids with me since you have no money anyway and just want to use me. i moved out on him and told him to go find a 50yr old sugar mama with lots of money to adopt his daughter and marry him. In that sense, i will not date single dads with kids or divorced dad with kids until i’m at least 50 unmarried with no kids.

By: dadshouse

dadshouse — Thu, 07 Aug 2008 21:40:12 +0000

This just in: Men More Likely Than Women to Adopt Children.

“It may be partly due to men getting married and adopting their spouse’s children from a previous relationship, the report said.”

So, single moms – maybe you do actually have it easier… ?

By: Holly Hoffman

Holly Hoffman — Mon, 04 Aug 2008 21:29:58 +0000

Coming in rather late in the conversation, but just had to throw my two cents in.

I’m not sure it is the same. For nearly every single mom out there, there’s some guy who didn’t feel like being a dad. That’s why (for some women) it’s heartening to see a dad doing what he’s supposed to, even though it didn’t work out.

On the other hand, no offense to present company, but it would be tough for me to be in a relationship with a single dad. My current BF has a kid and if she weren’t an 8-hour drive away, I’m not sure we would’ve made it this far. I had to do a lot of soul-searching before I could pull out a throat-choking, If this gets that far, I’ll love her because I love you but I’m still a little resentful of the 20% missing from your salary. It’s true that it’s just easier, especially if you’re still not sure whether or not you even want kids.

By: Lori W.

Lori W. — Fri, 01 Aug 2008 16:05:41 +0000

I’m a single, childless woman and I’m dating a guy with kids. I’ve dated two other guys with kids. I have to say (and I am trying not making generalizations), dating these guys showed me that there’s two sides to every situation. I worked with a woman whose husband didn’t want visitation or anything but the ones I dated were crushed when they couldn’t see their kids, etc. I’ve also seen some of the moms just call and say, “take the kids, I have to go to a concert/other thing this weekend” out of the blue. They’ve been happy to have their kids for an extra weekend but they’ve also been a little peeved at a lack of planning and/or a bit used. (Not everyone does this and yes, these are their children and sometimes emergencies do occur.)

I sometimes do feel like my current BF compartmentalizes his life: work, kids, me, house. Some of it I understand; if you only see your kids two weekends a month, is it worth it to introduce another person in the mix (esp. when they are teenagers). But sometimes I do feel frustrated with the segregation. I have met his kids; gone to the movies with them once or twice. I hang out with his mom a lot. And I’ve been included in house projects. (Lucky me, I know!)

I think all of us have something to contribute whether we’re single or not. I’ve been rejected because I wasn’t a mother and “wouldn’t understand what it’s like to have kids.” I’ve not rejected any guy because he had kids; in fact, I’ve judged men on how they parent or treat their kids and/or exes as possibilities. (Bad-mouthing will lead you to the Road to Nowhereville with me.)

I think single men with children in my area will win out over single women with children in dating just because it seems as if there are more women looking for men than men looking for women. I don’t think it’s because they are dads but because they are men, period. (BTW, Dad’s House, we’re in the area of your in-laws, if I remember correctly.)

By: laurakim123

laurakim123 — Fri, 01 Aug 2008 05:36:33 +0000

Gosh what an interesting read – both the article and the comments!

Possible single parenting is new to South Africa or we have a different perspective. In our media one is not portrayed as easier or harder so I have always assumed it was hard both ways!

I will say my married friends look at a single dad thats out with his kids in AWE. He does everything their husdands dont which does obviously make him more appealing! So I will agree with that point that was made!

By: dadshouse

dadshouse — Fri, 01 Aug 2008 04:39:16 +0000

This is a little strange – someone emailed me privately today for advice. (You know who you are). I replied without any problem. They wrote back with some followup questions. Now when I reply my email bounces. Perhaps the work email address they were using has decided to block personal emails for that person’s account.

If you’re that person and can email me from a different email address, I can try sending my reply again.

Nothing like using blog comments to circumvent an institution’s email server filter!