Metaphysical Magic
The very night I wrote about my frustration with some gold diggers in Silicon Valley, I went out to dinner and had my notions flipped upside down. There at the bar on either side of me were two couples eating dinner and drinking margaritas. At the end of the evening, one couple split the bill, and the other couple had the woman pay.
Clearly, these women weren’t gold diggers.
The real stickler for me, though, was that one of them was just the sort of woman I’d love to have enter my life (whether she pays for dinner or not!) – attractive, olive skin, dark hair, nice figure, great smile, incredibly sexy and affectionate.
Things didn’t stop there. After I left the restaurant, I saw couples everywhere walking hand in hand, arm in arm. Plenty of women sharing their feminine energy with a man. A beautiful summer night for lovers out on the town.
The whole experience made me realize I’ve been stuck on the notion that there aren’t enough single women here (there aren’t – census figures back me up on that) – when instead I could be stuck on the notion that there is a sexy, affectionate, grounded, compassionate woman out there who is perfect for me.
Big difference, no?
I went home, and picked up one of my favorite metaphysical books – The Game of Life and How to Play It, written in the 1920s by Florence Scovel Shinn (available free online in its entirety.) The techniques of The Game of Life are similar to those of The Secret
Here’s how it went:
• I cast off the burden of my lack (in this case lack of a woman, but it could be health, wealth, friends, whatever), and I freed myself to go enjoy life in the present moment. This doesn’t mean I stop trying to attain things, it just means I strop trying to manipulate and control the outcomes, especially where other people are concerned. Luck, serendipity, chance, coincidence, synchronicity, etc. all come into play. By casting the burden off, I stop worrying and just be happy, and let good things come into my life.
What this does is open the crown chakra so universal spirit guides my intuition.
• I reminded myself that all my righteous desires can and should manifest. Meanwhile, I let go of any unrighteous desires I held. (A good test for righteous is whether you’d feel fine telling your kids and friends about the thing you wanted, or whether they’d react negatively.)
What this does is open the heart to good things. When those good things happen, I don’t feel guilt, or envy, or tell myself I’m not good enough. Instead, I feel good about that thing manifesting, and allow it into my life.
• I imagined the sort of single woman I want to attract into my life, pictured her with me in everyday situations (in the kitchen together, on the couch, in bed, out on the town, etc.) – and reveled in the righteous desire to have a wonderful woman as my partner, and allowed myself to feel genuine joy when she manifests.
There’s more to it than these few steps, but the basic idea is simply to reprogram my psychological and emotional reactions to certain events, and change my thought patterns to allow positive things to manifest.
How well did it work?
I hit a busy neighborhood during Friday happy hour, and visited a Saturday art fair, and both times turned a lot of heads – women and men, old and young, smiled and said hello. Everyone seemed struck by my good mood.
When I focused my metaphysical magic more specifically on having a sexy affectionate woman in my life as part of my family, an entire family manifested – three generations, dressed to kill, celebrating an anniversary. They stopped me and asked me to take their photo.
Okay, maybe the metaphysical magic went a little too far in that case. Clearly, I have some honing in to do.
Then again, maybe one of those gorgeous women in the family was meant for me.
- A New Earth – Awakening to Your Life’s Purpose
- A Single Mom’s Dream Man
- Woman of My Dreams, Manifested
- Found Money – Karmic Law
- Sex, God and a Well Hung Prana – Ken Wilber’s Thoughts
- Hot, Sexy, Single – Law of Attraction
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Comment by The Exception
| July 22nd, 2009
A change of perspective and perception can work magic!! It is wonderful that you had a great weekend… remove those blocks, consider the windows that open over focusing on the door that is closed, and anything is possible!!
Ah, but remember, things might not end up looking exactly like you want… the universe has a sense of humor!
The Exception´s last blog ..Difficult Questions
Comment by Just Me...
| July 22nd, 2009
Perspective!! This is often what is lost when we are feeling down about an aspect of our lives.. The whole “it’s-awful-and-will-never-get-better” mentality..
Deciding that it will be better is the first step.. :) :)
Just Me…´s last blog ..FINALLY!!!!
Comment by Lance
| July 22nd, 2009
Hello, get a number!
Lance´s last blog ..Is Your Love Style Blowing Your First Dates?
Comment by MindyMom
| July 22nd, 2009
I had a similar thought after I wrote my post, “What Lies Beyond Date #1″. In short it was about having so many 1st dates but none that were with men I cared to date again. I thought to myself that I was putting a lot of time and energy into looking for someone and then I remembered the last time someone came into my life was when I stopped looking and was content with my life just as it was. Which is pretty much what you stated here:
“it just means I strop trying to manipulate and control the outcomes, especially where other people are concerned. Luck, serendipity, chance, coincidence, synchronicity, etc. all come into play. By casting the burden off, I stop worrying and just be happy, and let good things come into my life.”
Being pretty much in the same boat, I do think that is the answer for both of us.
MindyMom´s last blog ..Home is Where the Heart Is
Comment by used cars carrington
| July 22nd, 2009
I have the exact same feelings about single, attractive, intelligent, mentally healthy men being not available.
Comment by T
| July 22nd, 2009
Beautiful! I love this. And it worked for me!
Comment by Honey
| July 22nd, 2009
I’ve always said “happiness is a decision you make, not something you wait to happen to you.”
Honey´s last blog ..Is Your Love Style Blowing Your First Dates?
Comment by krn
| July 22nd, 2009
Sounds like a worthwhile exercise, Dad’s.
I understand your feelings, also. Sounds like many of us are in this situation. Add me to the list of singles who’ve enjoyed seeing other peoples’ connections this summer and felt happy and hopeful that this will manifest for me someday. Contentment with what is is a very nice feeling, yes?
Comment by Barry
| July 22nd, 2009
Awesome post. The Law of Attraction is so important. We all have times when we get in the negative mental trap (myself included). Thanks for the reminder. Gonna check out that book!
Barry´s last blog ..Single Parent Empty Nest Hard On The Heart
Comment by Sam
| July 22nd, 2009
I completely agree that good things happen when you’ve got a good mood to share. Great post!
Sam´s last blog ..Bobby Dickface
Comment by MommaSunshine
| July 22nd, 2009
We definitely attract what we put out into The Universe – positive OR negative. Good for you for putting out that positivity!
MommaSunshine´s last blog ..Anxiety
Comment by Kimberly
| July 22nd, 2009
Very interesting post!! Positive thinking leads to positive energy leads to positive reactions from others. This idea is so simple yet not many people can achieve it. I’m glad you’re doing this! I think everyone becomes happier and lighter when they are around someone like you.
Kimberly´s last blog ..What I Learned From My Blogging Vacation
Comment by CJ
| July 22nd, 2009
I like the casting off the burden of your lack part…that seems to be the part I always forget :)
CJ´s last blog ..Ok, things are getting a little heavy!
Comment by Abby Carter
| July 22nd, 2009
Thanks for the pep. Casting off lack struck me as well. Funny how we get so focused on what we don’t have rather than what we do. I really need to do some inviting into my world too. I have no doubt that Ms. Dreamy will walk into your life soon.
Abby Carter´s last blog ..Imagining the Unimaginable at Soaring Spirits
Comment by Mark
| July 22nd, 2009
Great stuff! You did the right thing, you eliminated the feeling that something was lacking and changed your thought patterns to that of abundance. Remember we don’t attract what we want, we attract what we are.
Mark´s last blog ..Feeding on Soul Food
Comment by dadshouse
| July 22nd, 2009
Lance – yes, I should have gotten a phone number. I actually almost asked grandpa as a joke “if I snap this photo, can I get the phone number of which ever daughter is single?” But asking a question like that in front of an entire brood… ah, I should have done it. If nothing else, it would have given them something to talk about it.
Mindy – that’s just one step, but it’s an important one. I find the casting the burden is huge (i.e. I don’t have to figure out the entire solution, the universe will help me), and having righteous desires is big also. Sometimes I forget that it’s okay to lust after a hottie IF she has other great traits that would make her a proper partner. Then it’s suddenly a righteous intent. And once I settle into that feeling of righteous intent, my heart opens up, and that’s the moment I seem to attract people.
I’ve read The Game of Life four times over the years, and every time it lifts my spirits, and raises my game. My only problem is, in the past, I stop using the techniques over time. So this time, I hope to keep using them going forward.
Comment by cindy
| July 22nd, 2009
I found your blog after looking for a recipe and read some other of your posts. Your writing style is awesome. I noticed you are in the bay area and also, that the focus of the blog is being a SINGLE dad. If you are near or in the south bay, I would ENCOURAGE you to attend the Singles Bible Study at Abundant Life Church. The leader of the group is Sister Lea and each bible study, she is on fire! ON FIRE, I MEAN IT! Anyways, don’t be put off at that it is a church if you are not religious or that it is called a Singles Bible Study. You will learn so much! And meet some nice people. I would recommend this to anyone living around there.
Comment by Sandra
| July 22nd, 2009
Nice post. I learned a lot from reading it, thanks.
From reading your past posts, I felt like you were more voicing your frustrations of what you didn’t want, such as gold diggers or women bitching about men. Nothing wrong with that, I just got the feeling that you were kinda fed up almost and frustrated.
I think that this is a better approach and I hope that you manifest yourself into a new relationship with an olive skinned hottie.
Sandra´s last blog ..Did I really say or do that ?
Comment by Damo
| July 23rd, 2009
Hey great strategy. It’s positive thinking. I was dating and couldn’t work out why I kept saying “this aint right for me” until I stepped back and did a similar change of perspective. Sure enough, unexpectedly, I met a great woman who is a great match.
PS: I enjoy your blog and even more so some of the comments. I will visit one day to say G’day!
Comment by notasoccermom
| July 24th, 2009
It is all perspective.
nice write-up
notasoccermom´s last blog ..Summer pictures
Comment by Gilit Frank
| July 24th, 2009
You wrote this beautifully. I didn’t learn anything new, but you helped me remember to review the basics. We often forget those, and choose to get in a rut and concentrate on what we DON’T have and forget what we have. In Israel, (greater Tel Aviv area) the statistics are in favor of the men, so perhaps you can send the guys over here -there are a lot of single, widowed, and divorced women looking for partners! I hope your magic will float over here into my all my single friends’ minds and spur the mens’ heads to turn here too!
Gilit Frank´s last blog ..Before the morning sun
Comment by PT-LawMom
| July 26th, 2009
Great post. This one really made me smile, especially reading about the whole family coming up to you. LOL! Hone your aim, man! ;-)
PT-LawMom´s last blog ..Boundary Issues
Comment by Ginger Magnolia
| July 26th, 2009
Hi there. Just stumbled over from Mindy’s blog, and I am wow-ed. What a great way to attract the good things, and I’m sure it works. I’ll be back, just going to pick up that book now…
Ginger Magnolia´s last blog ..Lying Liars and the Lies They Tell