Husband Wants to Watch
When it comes to dating and sex, I’m an open-minded guy. Older men younger women fantasies aside, sometimes I interact with women my age. Or even a little older.
A 50-year-old woman contacted me through an online dating profile. She asked if I would be into something casual, no strings attached.
Okay, I admit – as much as I’d love to be in a committed relationship, with emotional support, long term commitment, and built-in sex – I’m not opposed to the occasional romp with someone I’ve just met (when I’m unattached.) Single parents tend to miss out on intimacy, so even faux physical intimacy will do in a pinch.
This woman didn’t want to screw around with email tag. She suggested we talk on the phone.
“I’m blonde with a tight ballerina’s body,” she said.
Nice. (Do you really need this authorial view into a single man’s mind?)
“Just one thing,” she said. “My husband wants to watch.”
Huh. (Ibid.)
Okay – at this point, I was totally checked out of the conversation. I’m not going to sleep with a married woman, let alone do so when her husband is in the room, watching his wife and me get it on.
But I have a blog to write, and this is fodder, so I just rolled with it.
“A second thing,” she said. “We can’t host. Our apartment has paper-thin walls, and a nosey neighbor downstairs.”
Hey, we ain’t screwing at my place! But no problem, they wanted to meet in a motel. (With me paying half. Doh!)
“We don’t want to meet you in a bar or coffee house,” she said. “Those are too loud. We want to meet at the motel room.”
Okay, creep alert – who in their right mind would meet two strangers in a motel, get naked and start getting it on while a man watched – a man who could beat you senseless, tie you up or handcuff you (remember Something Wild?), kill you, steal your wallet, and leave you to rot – who on earth would agree to that?
Let’s just say she lost me at “husband wants to watch.”
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Comment by Cathy
| September 29th, 2009
Heck no, why would you want to screw some man’s wife when he won’t even pick up the tab for the motel room. Talk about an ingrate!
If you are going to be perverse the least you should do is be willing to pay for the pleasure you receive from it.
Cathy´s last blog ..Making A Child’s Dream Come True – Against The Odds
Comment by Ginger Magnolia
| September 29th, 2009
Yikes! I wonder if they ever found anyone?
Ginger Magnolia´s last blog ..Totally Music Tuesday
Comment by BigLittleWolf
| September 29th, 2009
I’m with Cathy on this one. Very bad manners. They’re inviting; they should pick up the tab. Do I need to add that to my list of items on Chivalry 101? Open the door for a woman, help her on with her coat, pick up the tab if you’re paying someone else to screw your wife in a motel room?
BTW Ginger Magnolia, I’m sure they found someone. It’s actually a very common fantasy. And acted out routinely by some. The safety and security issues – much less the unchivalrous payment plan were clues to this being bad news on all fronts.
BigLittleWolf´s last blog ..The AGE Issue: Older men, younger women
Comment by Janie Woods
| September 29th, 2009
ROTFLMAO!!! You have GOT to check out what I posted yesterday!! And no, I didn’t read your blog before I did…I didn’t realize this was a common occurrence!!
Janie Woods´s last blog ..Wow! THIS Was a First!!
Comment by T
| September 29th, 2009
Ha ha ha!!! I love BigLittleWolf’s response. Bad manners. That’s hilarious!
But yeah. They should at least offer to pay!!
Wow. I have read more stories like this lately. It makes for very entertaining blog fodder, for sure.
T´s last blog ..I need sex
Comment by Mindy/Single Mom Says...
| September 29th, 2009
So how was it? ;)
This seems to be a common theme in blogland of late. Danielle just posted about when she was propositioned. I can’t believe someone would put themselves in that particular situation – for safety reasons alone! Sheesh people, even I know there are clubs and stuff for swingers to find each other!
Mindy/Single Mom Says…´s last blog ..Still Here, Just Busy
Comment by QTMama
| September 29th, 2009
Wow. I mean, really, WOW. That’s your own Weird Thing of the Week, DH! *Laugh*
I love the bad manners comment!
QTMama´s last blog ..Click-ity Click, Part Deux
Comment by vinomom
| September 29th, 2009
You gotta stay off Craig’s List dude :)
Some real sickos out there!
vinomom´s last blog ..Catching Up as Best I Can
Comment by Danielle
| September 29th, 2009
Hey, do you still have their number? I could introduce them to the creepers from my blog.
There is a whole community of these people. I don’t know why they search out innocents like us Dad?? :)
Danielle´s last blog ..Can you add? What is 2 + 1?
Comment by Senorita
| September 29th, 2009
WOW.
I was scared after I read “Just one thing”.
The online world can be very creepy.
Senorita´s last blog ..A Post in a New York Minute.
Comment by Andrea
| September 29th, 2009
Um, EW.
Comment by Heather
| September 29th, 2009
LOL I don’t think so scooter!
Heather´s last blog ..my….my….my….
Comment by Cathouse Teri
| September 29th, 2009
Hilarious! They probably are not killers, but I’m with Cathy… who in the world would propose such a thing and then insist on meeting at a hotel room that you have to pay HALF for???
I have a similar story. I met a man online who wanted a ‘playmate,’ if you will. His wife has fibromyalgia and couldn’t ‘perform,’ if you will. She was cool with this. They were looking for someone to come and help take care of kids, service the husband and sometimes the wife, if she was feeling up to it.
And that’s not the worst of it. They couldn’t afford to put this person up in their own home or elsewhere nearby. They also couldn’t afford to fly the person out there, if this person lived some distance away.
I said, “So… let me get this straight… you want someone to do this out of the FUCKING KINDNESS OF THEIR HEART??”
Now, I’m pretty easy going and open minded. And fairly kind hearted. But he lost me at “my wife can’t perform.”
Cathouse Teri´s last blog ..Whoa Is Me!
Comment by Paula
| September 29th, 2009
You might want to refer your “friend” to this swingers club:
http://www.tjslastingimpressions.com/
No, I don’t belong, it just happens to be a few miles down the road (along with a large # of XXX stores… welcome to Republican Land).
The newspaper did a story on the club a while ago, seems they have a hot tub that seat 28 (or something like that). I started to gag imagining 28 people in that hottub- soaking in that hot swirling sticky gooey water…okay,. I’ll stop. UGH.
Comment by Paula
| September 29th, 2009
OOPS…it seats 80!
Barf!
Comment by Honey
| September 29th, 2009
Yeah, I’m with everyone else re: both the ick factor and the “there are entire organizations devoted to this” factor. The fact that they’re on Craigslist instead of one of those places just is another indicator of how cheap they are :-)
Honey´s last blog ..Adventures in YouPorn
Comment by Ditz
| September 29th, 2009
Wow Dads, that has all the earmarks of a robbery set-up; no email trail to find them, you show up (with money) and leave without it. So glad they ‘lost’ you!
Comment by Mark
| September 29th, 2009
Can you say red flags! Flags all over the field on this one! Amazing.
Comment by notasoccermom
| September 29th, 2009
I have been approached in a bar by a woman who asked me if I would like to come home with her and her husband. I am all for openness and intimacy. I am all for kinks.
But that just sounds so dangerous on so many levels.
I would think, have a few drinks with someone, get to know them, then maybe discuss something like this.
Not only are they total strangers to you and pose a risk but they too are ‘living on the borrowed time’
Interesting post but not so shocking
notasoccermom´s last blog ..September 2009- Autumn’s dawn
Comment by Keith Wilcox
| September 29th, 2009
Wow! I’ve only heard of these things after they happen (like in the crime section of the newspaper!) Good thing you seem like a smart guy :-) Yeah, unattached sex aint bad, but married woman with husband watching. Um, yeah, no.
Keith Wilcox´s last blog ..Halloween is Around the Corner!
Comment by MommaSunshine
| September 30th, 2009
heh. The mind of a true blogger – and a I do this too – “This will make a GREAT blog post”.
;-)
MommaSunshine´s last blog ..Running Update
Comment by krn
| September 30th, 2009
What an offer. I once helped treat a man (in the ED) who went along with this sort of thing. He was not seriously injured and admitted to having had an interesting time. He happened to have an adult toy attached to his body that got stuck and would have caused a problem in time. Yes, he paid cash and registered as “Mr. Smith” after driving a while to reach help in another town.
This story had stop signs instead of just plain ‘ole red flags flying. *rolls eyes*
Comment by The Exception
| October 1st, 2009
What a story – It is always interesting to see what people are into… and I think there are more men into this stuff than one might think.
The Exception´s last blog ..Happiness and Believing