Dad's House » sex

Couch Sex

dadshouse — Wed, 28 Oct 2009 10:20:20 +0000

I don’t know what it is about the leather couch in my TV room, but women love having sex on it. Yes, I said women. Cut me some slack. I’ve been divorced ten years, and I’ve owned this couch for seven. I’ve dated more than one woman in that time. (Please know that any couch sexy activity is couched on blankets, and the couch is kept clean for normal use.)

Why do women love getting it on, on my TV room couch?

I have a few theories:

My TV room is manly – the couch is brown leather, the walls of the room are sangria red, the coffee table is wrought iron and glass. This room is decidedly masculine. It’s sort of a man cave. Women love it!
I have music DVDs that are great for sex – depeche mode | devotional (oozes sex!), The Cure – Trilogy (classic background make-out noise), U2 Go Home – Live From Slane Castle (Bono on stage, what’s not to like?)
Being taken anywhere besides bed is hot – I once had a girlfriend want me to do her right on the dinner table. Sort of like The Postman Always Rings Twice. Um… my kids and I eat there? Another wanted to do it in the great outdoors (backyard sex rocks – but beware wild animals!)
We start out chatting and drinking wine, and then… (do I really need to explain this one?)

Just know, if you’re on the couch with me, there’s always the chance of an unexpected visit from one of my kids. You-know-what-us Interruptus will test even the horniest lover’s desire.

And on that note, I need to go watch Survivor (recorded on Tivo) with my kids.

On the couch!

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Do You Spoon Naked?

dadshouse — Tue, 13 Oct 2009 10:04:54 +0000

When you hit that magical night for third-date sex (or a sooner night, later night, whenever night; who’s counting?) – and you’re spooning all night with a new partner – do you wear pajamas? Sleep in your skivvies?

Or do you do it commando style and spoon naked?

I know my answer. And one woman I slept with was surprised at my choice.

On the one hand, if you’re laying all night with someone special, shouldn’t you enjoy a bit of contact, skin to skin?

On the other hand, if you’re sleeping, you’re sleeping. You don’t need bits and parts flailing about. On a cold night, you want to keep warm. Plus, some people like a feeling of softness, or a naughty look, in whatever they wear to bed.

Today at Dad’s House, I figured I’d open things up to readers and find out who spoons naked, and who prefers their partner stays buttoned up. I’m curious if there’s a generational difference, or if men and women have a different approach.

As for my preference? I didn’t give that away in this post. Feel free to guess.

Better yet, if you’re a woman – come find out for yourself.

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Husband Wants to Watch

dadshouse — Tue, 29 Sep 2009 10:23:10 +0000

When it comes to dating and sex, I’m an open-minded guy. Older men younger women fantasies aside, sometimes I interact with women my age. Or even a little older.

A 50-year-old woman contacted me through an online dating profile. She asked if I would be into something casual, no strings attached.

Okay, I admit – as much as I’d love to be in a committed relationship, with emotional support, long term commitment, and built-in sex – I’m not opposed to the occasional romp with someone I’ve just met (when I’m unattached.) Single parents tend to miss out on intimacy, so even faux physical intimacy will do in a pinch.

This woman didn’t want to screw around with email tag. She suggested we talk on the phone.

“I’m blonde with a tight ballerina’s body,” she said.
Nice. (Do you really need this authorial view into a single man’s mind?)

“Just one thing,” she said. “My husband wants to watch.”
Huh. (Ibid.)

Okay – at this point, I was totally checked out of the conversation. I’m not going to sleep with a married woman, let alone do so when her husband is in the room, watching his wife and me get it on.

But I have a blog to write, and this is fodder, so I just rolled with it.

“A second thing,” she said. “We can’t host. Our apartment has paper-thin walls, and a nosey neighbor downstairs.”

Hey, we ain’t screwing at my place! But no problem, they wanted to meet in a motel. (With me paying half. Doh!)

“We don’t want to meet you in a bar or coffee house,” she said. “Those are too loud. We want to meet at the motel room.”

Okay, creep alert – who in their right mind would meet two strangers in a motel, get naked and start getting it on while a man watched – a man who could beat you senseless, tie you up or handcuff you (remember Something Wild?), kill you, steal your wallet, and leave you to rot – who on earth would agree to that?

Let’s just say she lost me at “husband wants to watch.”

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Virile In My 40s

dadshouse — Fri, 18 Sep 2009 10:10:06 +0000

Men over 40 can’t get it up!

Or so some women say.

At least they’ve said that to me, before we dated. After? That’s a different story entirely…

Head on over to the Silicon Valley Moms blog as I corrupt the moms with a dad’s view of old guy virility.

Virile In My 40s

(If that pre-programmed link doesn’t work, try this link to all Dad’s House posts at SVMoms.)

I promise you won’t need any blue pills to read this post.

Just as I don’t need blue pills for…oh, you know.

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Drinking and Sex – Time for a Study!

dadshouse — Fri, 11 Sep 2009 10:00:11 +0000

Those wacky French – for reasons known only to them, they commissioned a study about booze and sex.

As in, drinking booze makes you more likely to have sex.

Ya’ think!?

(If you’re not sure you agree, check my backyard sex, wild animal story. It happened after cocktails.)

Of course, such a ridiculous French study needs a ridiculous Hot Dads response. Head on over to the Hot Dads blog and read about:

Drinking and Sex – Time for a Study!

Then if you aren’t in the mood for sex, come back for a drink so you will be…

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Mark Sanford, Eliot Spitzer, Gavin Newsom – Move Over!

dadshouse — Fri, 26 Jun 2009 10:00:42 +0000

Forget the Jon and Kate divorce indiscretions – there have been some crazy affairs going on with politicians of late.

South Carolina Governor Mark Sanford secretly left for Argentina to have a cry-fest with his secret lover. (Seems his wife knew about his mistress 5 months ago… huh? You can’t make this stuff up!) Upon returning to the US, Sanford gave a surreal press conference where he rambled on about hiking as a young boy, getting the soccer coach to act as chaperon, and saying how God’s law isn’t a “list of do’s and don’ts, just for the heck of do’s and don’ts.”

At some point, Gov. Sanford admitted to the affair, saying that “from a heart level, there was something real” between him and his mistress.

Then there was New York Governor Eliot Spitzer’s scandalous rendezvous with call girl Ashley Dupre . Don’t know whether his heart felt there was something real there or not.

And who can forget San Francisco Mayor Gavin Newsom’s affair with the wife of his friend and campaign manager? I’m thinking from a heart level, there was some real slime there.

(Not to condone affairs, but at least Gov. Sanford seemed to have fallen in love. He knew the woman for eight years before their friendship turned into something with real sparks. Of course, it’s a shame it happened at the expense of his wife.)

But all three of these politicians – Mark Sanford, Eliot Spitzer, and Gavin Newsom – need to move over and give it up for the Italian Prime Minister, Silvio Berlusconi. Apparently, Berlusconi’s been having affairs for years, and dodging the criticism so well that they nicknamed him the “Teflon” Prime Minister.

Just one problem – this time, Berlusconi’s purported love interest was a prostitute.

Did Italian prime minister Silvio Berlusconi apologize to his wife and friends? No, the 72 year-old defended his manliness.

“I have never paid a woman. I never understood what the satisfaction is when you are missing the pleasure of conquest.”

Take that, Sanford, Spitzer, and Newsom!

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Where’s the Happy Ending?

dadshouse — Tue, 09 Jun 2009 10:10:51 +0000

Everyone loves a happy end. No, I don’t mean the story book kind. I mean… you know… the other kind? (Ahem.)

If you don’t know what I mean, or even if you do – head on over to the Hot Dads blog for a sizzling hot post titled:

Where’s the Happy Ending?

I have a feeling this particular post will elicit some discussion. So weigh in! Give me grief if you disagree. Give the nay-sayers grief if you think I’m spot on.

And if you need some grief relief, have yourself a gin and tonic, or one of my killer Mai Tais. That will bring a happy ending, for sure.

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